I know you are feeling neglected and disrespected. We started out with such passion and desire and you have never once let me down. Whenever I checked in with you I was never locked out. You didn’t disappear or refuse to let me in. You took me back time after time and trusted me with your deepest darkest secrets and your whole being, but the relationship was failing because I had forgotten the joy and love having you had given me. The hours we spent together as we created a life together choosing wallpapers and colour schemes and setting out our plans to grow old together were forgotten. I could make excuses and say I was too busy at work, but that would be a lie.
I ‘m the one at fault. I never set out to hurt you but my head was turned. I had a shiny new book to promote and you weren’t very interested. Yes, you managed to encourage a trickle of readers most days, and you even enticed a few great guests who turned the trickle into a deluge, but I was disappointed that you couldn’t encourage click throughs and so I sought a new love.
I threw myself into a new relationship with the next book in the series. This one would be all I wanted it to be and would fulfil my wildest fantasies. My heart raced anew with passion and I woke up anticipating seeing that manuscript again. Fondling the laptop keys, stroking the mouse, and swapping flirty banter with my characters. That was just the start of the spiral that led us to where we are today.
When the manuscript refused to co-operate, and the characters demanded I spend more time plotting, I decided to slow the relationship down. Book one, Lost Cause, still loved me. The characters were cheerful and funny and all they wanted was to be heard. Determined to find the one thing that could give them, and me, what we wanted, I threw myself at Twitter, Facebook, Author Loops, Goodreads and any other passing fancy that caught my eye. I flirted and teased and all but prostituted myself for the sake of rankings. It was never about the money, it was never fame, it was about people reading the book and enjoying it.
Night after night I went out flaunting my wares whilst you stayed home, alone, unloved and uncared for. Updates came and went. Your
comments section became dusty, and spiders and mice made their home in your spam folder, and yet you stoically soldiered on greeting guests from India, Brazil, Russia and other far flung places. You did all you could to entertain them whilst I was out on the raz with my new found marketing toys.
I am sorry. Can you ever forgive me? I could promise never to neglect and take you for granted again but we both know that is not a promise I could actually keep. Something new and shiny will wiz by, or someone will dangle a book under my nose or a new blog promising the secret to being a number one best seller, and I will disappear again. It might not even be a blog or book it could be a new social media site….Oh Ello!
Sorry, what was I saying? Oh yes, please take me back. I can’t promise to be perfect but I can promise to try and update you on a more regular basis. Surely we can rebuild what we once had and move forward together. I await your reply.
Your loving friend.